Feeling almost–chipper.

It’s incredible, the impact taking action can have on your mood. I’ve woken up this morning a little tired, but otherwise feeling quite good.

Yesterday, I went to the doctor. I was actually a bit assertive in ensuring I got an appointment – something that I don’t normally do. The word ‘depression’ certainly gets the receptionists acting to find something for you.

Anyhoo – I’m now on anti-depressants. The latest downtown has made it clear that this is more than a one-off event and I’m happy to use medication – once I know that my body can’t fight off the problem itself. Some of the side-effects came into being pretty quickly, particularly some nausea. Doctor’s advice is to just put up with it, it will wear off in a couple of weeks as my brain starts to adjust to the new chemistry. As long as it’s not too bad, of course – if I get really sick, back to see her immediately. Otherwise, I’ve got an appointment in two weeks to check on my progress.

It’s gonna take six weeks for the drugs to start taking an affect – it’s going to be interesting to see what that is. The bad part of all this – I can’t drink until things have settled down. *sob*

I’m going to be on the anti-depressants for at least 18 months – in the doctor’s words, it generally takes a year to sort out what caused it in the first place, and then you get slowly weaned off until you’re back relying on your natural brain chemistry.

Talking of sorting out – I’ve decided to get a new counsellor. Although my first counsellor said and did some good stuff, there was also a sense of pushing their agenda and and trying to force a mutual relationship by doing things such as pushing the fact they were a writer too. And there was a general lack of – studied professionalism, I’ll call it. Not that I doubted their ability of credentials and I don’t want someone who’s all buttoned up and can’t relate, but the way things were being run were a little too relaxed for my comfort.

Yeah, I’m generally laid-back and I require a counsellor who is too – but I’m also driven and conscientious and I want to feel that from my counsellor as well.

This is a brand new person I’ve not met before, and I think it will be good to go back to the beginning and work things through now that I’m past the initial triggering event. So that’s on Wednesday.

So having seen the doctor and made the appointment with a new counsellor yesterday, I’m feeling like I’m taking control again. Add to that the fact that yesterday (despite problems with concentrating) was a good day work-wise and it’s no wonder I feel good today.

I’m going to take this day, run with it and do what I can, because who knows how long this will last.